is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize