i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
