scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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