I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
