Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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