I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
