Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize