Yo dont text me then not text me
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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