i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
