I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
