youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
