idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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