it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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