They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize