Its about making memories worth repressing
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
