Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
