I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
