Walk of Shame. In a state park.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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