it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
