i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm bleeding and have questions
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
