you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
