Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize