so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
