Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
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It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.