Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
wow bdsm is so cute
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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