I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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