You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
