I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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