i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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