is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
How does one acquire holy water?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
