I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
