Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
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My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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