Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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