he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize