Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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