I'm so fucking centered right now
Me too!
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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