..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
We had to coat check the pizza.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
