i just made my gag reflex go away.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize