Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.

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  (850): Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now. (1-850): Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel. http://tfl.nu/j1ot
  Replies (80) Good night (3911) Bad night (573)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.

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  (248): I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first. http://tfl.nu/88zr
  Replies (18) Good night (3422) Bad night (413) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you

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  (818): my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you http://tfl.nu/x2i9
  Replies (30) Good night (5772) Bad night (803) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are

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  (805): Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are http://tfl.nu/ste8
  Replies (16) Good night (6425) Bad night (576) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.

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  (901): at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby. http://tfl.nu/xhbt
  Replies (8) Good night (797) Bad night (3178) Order T-Shirt
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers

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  (225): She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers http://tfl.nu/m8b0
  Replies (9) Good night (743) Bad night (1768) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.

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  (724): They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now. http://tfl.nu/wmrg
  Replies (7) Good night (1882) Bad night (543) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?

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  (804): I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again? http://tfl.nu/ryyt
  Replies (2) Good night (1000) Bad night (422)
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  (925): View more from California

  She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set

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  (925): She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set http://tfl.nu/ske1
  Replies (6) Good night (496) Bad night (1623)
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  (925): View more from California

  It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.

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  (925): It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day. http://tfl.nu/ynaj
  Replies (5) Good night (1102) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
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  (408): View more from California

  I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.

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  (408): I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up. http://tfl.nu/jlt9
  Replies (0) Good night (671) Bad night (336) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week

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  (636): A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week http://tfl.nu/594f
  Replies (1) Good night (713) Bad night (264) Order T-Shirt
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  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair

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  (+31): Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair http://tfl.nu/outv
  Replies (3) Good night (444) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.

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  (778): Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town. http://tfl.nu/ynab
  Replies (4) Good night (707) Bad night (289)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,

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  (609): i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina, http://tfl.nu/dlk2
  Replies (15) Good night (950) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt

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