I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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