Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
