you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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