when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
