I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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