i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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