You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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