Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
