I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
