watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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