I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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