yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Randomize
