woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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